Persuasion is a skill that can play a massive part in how successful you are in your life. If you can persuade people to think in the same way that you do, you’ll be able to get what you want a achieve more.
While some people may have a natural flair for being persuasive, we all have the potential to learn. It all comes down to being emotionally intelligent, that is being able to perceive manage and regulate emotions.
If you want to learn how to be more persuasive, you’ve come to the right place. These tips will boost your skills and have you winning others over in no time.
1. Make others feel happy
You may think that a persuasive person can get their way all the time, but this isn’t necessarily the case. They know that sometimes you have to lose a battle to win the war and they are good at pleasing people, making compromises and standing their ground when they need to. It’s better to be successful than to be right all the time, and by making others happy when you can, you’ll be in a stronger position to win them over when it counts.
2. Don’t be pushy
Pushy people are a big turn off. Instead of being pushy, persuasive people are good at confidently establishing their ideas. They don’t ask for too much and they don’t argue aggressively as they know that subtlety is more effective at winning people over in the long run. If you know that your idea is a great one, be calm and confident and people will more often come around to your way of thinking in time.
3. Deliver with confidence
Where pushiness is off-putting, confidence is key. If you present your thoughts/ideas as questions or make them sound as though they need approval from others, they will become unconvincing. Use facts and statements to deliver with confidence and avoid using phrases like “I think” and “It is possible that.”
4. Know your audience
If you want to persuade someone around to your way of thinking, you’ll need to use their language. When dealing with a shy person, you should tone down your assertiveness, but a high energy person may need you to dial it up. Everyone is different and you’ll need to use your knowledge of their personalities to tailor the way you approach persuading them.
5. Paint a picture
Research has shown that if people can visualise and bring something to life, they are far more likely to be persuaded by it. If you aren’t in a scenario when you can use actual images, telling vivid stories can help to have the same effect. Great stories create images in our minds that can make it easier to relate and remember.
6. Use positive body language
A great trick you can use to open people up more to your line of argument is using positive body language. While much of our body language is subconscious, by being more aware of your gestures you will be more persuasive. You should:
- Keep your arms uncrossed (open body language)
- Maintain eye contact (but not in a creepy way)
- Lean in towards whoever is speaking
- Use an enthusiastic tone
7. Keep smiling
Did you know that people naturally mirror the body language of people they are having a conversation with? You can make people like you and feel good by smiling at them because they will start to smile too. If you’re genuinely enthusiastic about your ideas, you’ll probably be smiling anyway, and this will be contagious.
8. Acknowledge the point of view of others
No one’s perfect and acknowledging that by conceding on some points is a very powerful persuasion tactic. Going into any argument, presentation or debate, it’s important to have an open mind and willingness to make adjustments. Stubbornly sticking with only your ideas will rub others up the wrong way.
By listening to others and taking their points on board, you’ll demonstrate that you have their best interests at heart. Statements like “I see where you’re coming from,” and “That makes sense,” shows that you are really listening and valuing their input. Everyone’s opinion is valid and should be respected.
9. Ask good questions
When trying to get our point across and persuade others, a common mistake many of us make is not listening properly because we are too busy thinking about what we want to say next. To avoid this and show that you are listening you should try to ask good questions. Clarifying something that someone has said is a good method to show interest and gain respect.
10. Use names
Your name is a massive part of your identity and it feels good when others use it. Persuasive people know this and regularly use others’ names in conversation and you should too if you want to be more persuasive.
11. Form connections
The more you can share about yourself and build connections with others, the more likely you will be able to persuade them of your point of view. This is because people more easily accept what you’re saying if they have a good sense of the type of person you are.
12. Be genuine
Genuineness and honesty are key to being persuasive. People do not like fake people because they don’t feel like they can trust them. Being genuine means focusing on what makes you happy and drives you and being confident in who you are. If you’re comfortable in your own skin and just do you, people will naturally trust you more and you’ll be better able to win them over.
13. Know when to back off
When trying to be more persuasive, you’ll want to tread lightly, and urgency will often push them to stand by their original opinion. If you’re confident in your view, there shouldn’t be any harm in letting it sink in for others. Sometimes people just need space and time to think about things before changing their minds.